KAYLEE | NORTH CAROLINA

“On Sunday June 12th, 2022 my husband Landon and I noticed a knot on our six week old daughter Rowan’s clavicle. We asked my mom, who we lived with, to come look at Rowan’s collarbone. There was no bruising, swelling, or redness and it wasn’t hot to the touch. Rowan didn’t act like it bothered her at all, even when we moved her arm. My mom said to wait and call the pediatrician Monday to see what they say, but as a brand new mom I didn’t want to wait. So Landon and I took her to the emergency room.

After multiple sets of X-rays and long hours of waiting, we were finally seen by the ER doctor. She walked into our room, sat down, and asked ‘what have you done to this poor baby?’ I looked at Landon, he looked at me, we both looked back at her. We were so confused. She told us she had notified CPS and asked if we understood what it takes for a child to sustain these types of ‘injuries.’

I was fuming. Injuries? Rowan wasn’t swollen, red, or bruised. Nothing had ever happened to her. She’d never been dropped, never rolled off the bed, there was never a hand on her that wasn’t in my eyesight. I was still on maternity leave so I mean it when I say my daughter was never out of my sight.

They jumped straight to accusing us of child abuse. There were no questions asked regarding medical issues or concerns. It was just diagnosed as child abuse. I called my mom and dad and they rushed up to the hospital where Rowan was being admitted.

Rowan received an MRI, CT scan, two full skeletal surveys, I don’t know how many blood draws, imaging, and who knows what other testing we were not informed of. We still have yet to get all the paperwork from our accusing hospital.

Monday morning we were met by a child abuse pediatrician (CAP). She came into our room and started listing all these fractures and causes. Never once showed us the X-rays. I tried to ask a thousand questions about illnesses, birth trauma, vitamin deficiencies… everything. It was all shot down. We were told abuse is abuse. She also said that Rowan suffered ‘severe head trauma’ but never specified what it was. Then she left.

That afternoon, two social workers came to our room and told us they were placing Rowan into foster care. I lost it. We had to go back to the room and get our things. First, I picked up Rowan. I made her a bottle and fed her, crying and trying to soothe myself and her. They kept telling me to hurry. I didn’t listen. After about 9 minutes they came over, took her out of my arms and we were literally pushed out of the hospital room and they followed us to the elevator.

My baby. My only baby. My six week old baby was alone in a hospital. I was distraught.

We went as instructed to the DSS office to meet the investigator. She stated she was blown away because Rowan was beautiful and clearly not harmed. She said the investigation would take no more than 30-45 days and then Rowan should be home, but until then we needed to meet with our court appointed attorneys. We were also told we weren’t permitted to see Rowan until we went to court. I don’t remember much of the meeting. I was a disaster. I couldn’t breathe or think, I just needed my baby. I do remember them agreeing to let my grandmother go to the hospital and stay in the hospital with Rowan until court.

The next day I went straight to the hospital medical records office and got all of Rowan’s and my medical records. They hadn’t taken me off of Rowan’s charts yet so I pulled everything I could. My grandmother was still at the hospital with Rowan and she received a copy of the discharge paperwork for Rowan. It had all her blood work on it as well as the accusations. It was horrifying. Rowan’s levels were all over the place. Nothing was normal. And the accusations were terrifying. 7-8 rib fractures, long bone fractures, ankle fractures, clavicle fracture, and a subdural hematoma.

While I was getting the medical records, Landon and my dad found an attorney (because we weren’t willing to risk using court appointed attorneys) and my dad helped by paying the $5,600 deposit.

Then my grandmother called. They had kicked her out of the hospital. She had stepped away to get coffee and came back to an empty room. They took my baby. They sent Rowan home with a foster parent. Without telling any of us. I was devastated. Landon was my backbone because I couldn’t eat, sleep, think, breathe. It was awful.

A couple days later I received a text from an old coworker asking about Rowan. I asked what she meant because I hadn’t even had time to tell anyone about our situation. She sent me a screenshot of a picture. The foster mom had taken photos with my Rowan and shared them on social media, saying she wanted to keep her and loved her so much already. I was livid. I called our attorney. We sent him all the information and documentation we had and he said to keep it in our back pockets.

Thursday was court day. DSS asked for a continuation (because they had no answers or proof). Our attorney asked for unlimited supervised visitation because of the concern for unknown medical conditions, not to mention Rowan was only 6.5 weeks old. She needed us. The judge granted the supervised visitation and also sanctioned my grandparents’ home so Rowan could live with them. No more foster care! Rowan came home to my grandparents. As soon as I got there I cried and held Rowan for hours. I didn’t know this was the beginning of an 18 month long nightmare.

In October 2022 we were sent to an endocrinologist. She was in network with our accusing child abuse pediatrician so we didn’t have much faith, but the appointment went well. She discussed sending Rowan to physical therapy to get a diagnosis for potential Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (EDS) because after reading through Rowan’s charts, she said metabolic bone disorders and EDS came to mind. We started physical therapy in October 2022 and it was the best thing we ever did.

November 17th, 2022 we had court again, with our whole community behind us: our pastor and his wife, family, friends, coworkers, bosses, and even a county commissioner. After lunch break, Landon and I were asked to step into a conference room. They asked us to sign a stipulation. Our attorney said it wasn’t an admission of guilt, but it was an acknowledgment that the CAP wasn’t backing down from her ‘findings.’ We signed to get our case adjudicated and to get our reunification plan started. It hurt, but we needed our girl home. I wasn’t willing to waste time. They found Rowan to be abused and neglected, but said it was unknown who did it. They then put a reunification plan in place.

Between November and February Landon and I completed parenting classes, child abuse prevention classes, personal therapy, psychological evaluations, cognitive clinical assessments, and anything else they threw our way.

In January of 2023 my mom, Rowan, and I were all diagnosed with a hereditary connective tissue disorder, hEDS, as had been suspected by the endocrinologist.

November 9th 2023 we went to court again. This time the judge was angry. Medical answers, court orders, and our GAL (attorney appointed by the state to represent a child’s best interest) were all screaming to send Rowan home, yet CPS/DSS still refused. The judge stated that DSS had disobeyed court orders. She ordered Rowan to come home and publicly apologized to us for the trauma and untimeliness of the department. She stated this had become more traumatic than helpful to our daughter and to us. That night we picked Rowan up and took her home.

On December 14th 2023, the judge ordered return of custody and all rights. Our case was closed! We were done. 550 days of trauma, hurt, anger, confusion, answers, and prayers later our girl was home.

Rowan is our beautiful hEDS warrior and I’m so proud of her. She’s so strong and happy. We love her so much. We welcomed her little brother in October of 2023, right at the end of our case. Landon and I stood together stronger than ever. We have Rowan in physical therapy still and we will be starting occupational therapy soon! We’re also still seeing our endocrinologist.

18 months. 550 days.

A nightmare I never thought we’d wake up from. I thank God everyday for carrying us through all of this.

We are forever changed and traumatized. But now it’s time to navigate a new beginning as a family of four. ”